( I'm Jagoda



I'm 20 years old



I'm a/an <s>god awful</s> aspiring filmmaker/avant-garde theater person thing



I'm of Bosnian, Albanian, Serbian (which is amazing since Albanians and Serbs hate eatchother's guts) and Roma (Gypsy) decent



My grandfather was a Holocaust survivor. He lived in Germany at the time and was imprisoned because he was half Roma



I was raised Muslim. Now I'm a heathen ;)



I have two older brothers. I have a love/hate relationship with both



I live with my dad but not with my mom because she's an asshole



I have a cat named Kittytang and 4 fish



I suffer from epilepsy, mild brain damage and type1 bipolar disorder (the most severe one)



I had lesions on my brain which caused my epilepsy removed and I haven't had a seizure since



My paternal grandmother looks like Edith Massey and my maternal grandmother looks like Keith Richards



David Bowie is my all time favorite musician and I worship him in a god-like way



My favorite band is Xiu Xiu


My favorite female solo artist is Nico. My second favorite is Tori Amos


I saw A Clockwork Orange for the first time when I was 8. It warped my fragile little mind!



I used to abuse the following drugs: acid, E, shrooms, coke, inhalents, morphine, heroin, crack, speed and the worst crystal meth



I still do marijuana, acid and coke from time to time



I like to fashion my hair styles after anime characters



I have a very warped, sick sense of humor. Practically nothing offends me



I'm a heavy smoker. I smoke 15-20 or more cigarettes a day. My brand of choice are Marlboro Reds


I'm a big fan of iced coffee, even before it became hip


I'm a latent hipster. Don't tell anyone!


All my friends are gay guys and my only female friend is a lesbian. We actually dated briefly (I'm bi). Her temperment is the polar opposite of mine. I'm not sure why she likes me


I'm a big porn fan. I like hentai, yaoi, yuri, solo, gay porn and girl on girl. I hate straight porn.



I like really bizarre, fucked up movies



When I was on meth, I'd only share it with certain guys only if they had sex with another guy in front of me



When I did meth, I usually smoked it and most of my teeth rotted out of my skull. I had them replace with titanium caps. I look like fucking Flava Flave!



When I first had a seizure, my stupid grandmother thought an evil spirit was possesing me, and she tried to excorsize me

I spend way to much fuckin' time on the internet


I think reality shows are total bullshit


I prefer cartoons over most live-action shows


I'm addicted to hydrocodone, which is like Vicodin but more potent. It makes me feel goooooooooooooood!


I hate Family Guy with an oh-so-burning passion


I can't stand people who think sex and nudity are evil


I have 96 pairs of shoes. You can't borrow any of them!

I appologize for NOTHING and NO ONE. If I hurt your poor widdle feelings, TOUGH SHIT!

I am neither a Republican or Democrat. They both annoy the hell out of me most of the time. If anything, I'm probably more of a Libertarian

Ok, that's all I can think of for now

I back home living with my dad, stepmom, big brother and baby brother. Generally, I do not like babies at all but he's so damn cute! He used to hate me but now he loves me. I bounce him on my knee and he goes "GeeeEEEEEGrrrrRRRR"! Funny kid. I missed my dog and cat too.

Oh yeah, if I didn't have sex until September, it would have been two years since, BUT I GOT LAID TO-DAY! There were these three horny black guys I met at the liquor store (no, we didn't fuck in the liquor store) and we had dirty sex back at one of their houses. I only got screwed by two of them, the other one was too obsessed with looking at porn on the nets PLUS I got free weed and booze. I hadn't had sex with a black guy, let alone TWO in like 5 years so I was a bit tight. Now I have a wizard sleeve from those limousines

yeah, that's all. I'm so happy I got to have sex!

I gave in and made a Twitter account: https://twitter.com/goatfuckyerself
only because I like saying small, random things. I would waste alot of entries if I did that here. Feel perfectly free to add me!

Man, this just really sucks. I read this article where they interviewed 3 of his 4 ex-wives (lol) and they said he liked to do this thing where he 'tied himself up for pleasure'. Uh, it's calld BONDAGE!!! Unfortunately for him, he went a little toooo far this time. I actually cried watching Larry King (and I hate Larry King!) where they interviewed Tarantino (I really need to rent Kill Bill. Carradine played Bill) and other people who worked with him and they just said what a generous, passionate awesome guy he was. I had rented the Kung Fu serious from Netflix in the past and just thought this guy was awesome and wanted to see everything else he was in. I don't know what I'm going to do when Clint Eastwood goes tits up. I fucking worship him. I don't agree with his political beliefs, but he is the fucking man! I'm gonna be upset too when Hu

RIP Mr. Carradine. He was only 72, jeez

here's a bizarre, funny scene where he talks to "Jesus" from the short film Many Faces

Yesterday, my step-mother decided to invite my mother and my Gjshe (grandma), for dinner (we had lasangna from scratch YUMMMM!). I was sort of forced to go because my brother had nothing to cook and kept nagging me about it. Now, I've mentioned, I'm estranged from my mother but I thought, hey, maybe she'll behave. Well not really.

I didn't say hello to her or looked at her most of the time until she said, "I know you don't get along with me, but I am your mother and you should show some respect to me" my answer "I think of you as an invasion of ants--you ruin everyting and it's hard to get rid of you". My perpetually Bacchic father scolded me and told me to have more respect towards my mother. His was more pissed at his only daughter than at his ex-wife. About when we were having desert (tiramisu!), she blurted out of the blue "what do these queers and dykes think they're going to accomplish with their stupid signs and protests? God made Prop 8 pass because they're disgusting in his eyes", me, livid yelled "YOU'RE AN ABOMINATION IN GOD'S EYES YOU PREJUDIST CUNT" so I made my brother take me home immediately after that, ignoring all the you shouldn't talk to your mother like that bullshit.

I really cannot stand that woman!

Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday *orgasm* Miss Monroooooeee, Happy Birthday to you!

it's weird to think that one of the most physically gorgeous women, if she'd live, would be old enough to be our grandma! She would be 83 if she were alive today! She probably would of had alot of work done but still, that's an old lady I'd tap any day! She didn't even live to be 40. I still think the Kennedy's were involved in her death somehow...anyway, I don't care what you sexual orientation is, who wouldn't want to do her! AND she was a very good actress so she wasn't just sex and no substance. I hope she's been resting peacfully for 49 years.

-I've been awake all night and I had a horrible anxiety attack around 6am. I later found out it probably was because I forgot to take ALL my pills of the previous day. I have to take them EVERY day because I'll go ape-shit if I don't!

-I've gotten back to smoking 1 1/2 packs of cigarettes a day. I have a bonafide smoker's cough. I was outside in the beautiful moist (but cold) dawn and these flock of little birds started to kick eachother's asses! They were tweeting like they were on meth! I was chanting "BIRD FIGHT! BIRD FIGHT! BIRD FIGHT!" I'm such a dork

-I may be moving to Palmdale (ugh) this fall, just so I'd be closer to my school (which is in Valencia a 40ish minute drive from Palmdale) it's more expensive to live in Valencia but I don't want to live in the desert! But I heard Palmdale's businesses are booming (which I'm suprised since the Antelope Valley is a DUMP. We went on a field trip to Edward's Airforce Base once and we went to Lancaster, which is right next to Palmdale, for lunch. It's a fucking wasteland!)

-I'm addicted to The Venture Bros. It's so fucking hilarious! I love when they mention less mainstream pop culture references. And Dr.Girlfriend is so fucking hot, I don't care if she sounds like a plummer from Brooklyn! I WANT TO SEE HER NAKED!

3 1/2. English, Serbian, Bosnian (which is basically Serbian but has more Turkish loan words) and a little Albanian. I need to learn Romany, that's the other part of my heritage. Actually, I need to learn Spanish more than anything else. I live in Southern California ;)

neighther, they're just usually fucked up and weird. You know that dream where your trying to find a toilet and there's not privacy, I have that with masturbation dreams

My stupid Yahoo homepage did NOT tell me that Dom DeLuise died on the 4th. WTF? The man was one of the greatest comedic actors ever! And he reminded me so much of my own dad (ie very fat). I didn't find out til I went to the AOL homepage to make a new mail account and they showed him in a 2009 obituary. I thought "omg, he must have just died!" but it was 6 fucking days ago and my brother and stepmom (my stepmom loved him, probably because they're both Italian...and he was shaped like my dad) and I was like, why didn't you fucking tell me? He had prostate cancer (I thought he had a massive heart attack) and he was only 75. Poor guy. He seemed like a very loving family man and of course he was funny as fuck. RIP Dom

I'm getting fucking tired of hearing about this goddamn swine flu hysteria. THOUSANDS of people around the world get the flue that's no different from this one. Some recover, some die, depends on how you're treated. This is just a wider spread of it. Since Mexico is basically a third world country, it's no wonder that over 100 people have died from it. My brother is all paranoid right now because they found a strain of it in Long Beach (we live in Torrance, which is right next to Long Beach) and tomorrow we're going to Disney's California adventure and he's worried they'll close it down. Dude, they'll give us fucking masks if they have to, they're not closing the only Disney theme park I can get drunk at! Yes, we're all going to end up like what's in this entries icon. Jesus fucking Christ on a tooth pick!

I sold out and got a Facebook

Jagoda Kuklović's Profile

Create Your Badge

add me? Or make your own and add me?

This video has cracked me up to the point where I almost peed my pants because a)I had 3 1/2 glasses of wine b)I have the maturity of an 8 year old boy c)all of the above. I'll pick the latter

Dear reproductive organs,

Please stop dropping an egg on my uterin wall. I am not going to fertilize it. I'm never going to fertilize it. I don't like that sensation of my ovary pushing an egg out (it's called mittelschmerz). It hurts. Also, my tits hurt too. And I don't like having crankiness, fatigue and crying at the drop of a hat. However, I do like the horny part (makes sense you'd be horny if you were to concieve). Even though that horny part DID make me fuck my cousin once, and impregnated me but caused a really gross miscarriage, it's one of the few times I get horny.

your's Pmsly,
Godacat

Tomorrow I'm scheduled to get 6 of my teeth fixed with silver caps. I already have 8 other teeth silver capped. I'm going to look like Genesis P-Orridge soon

I, like may of you I'm sure, am so FUCKING TIRED OF HEARING ABOUT CHRIS WHATSHISNAME AND RIHANNA!!. Everyone's trying to make them look like the fucking half-assed 21st century Ike and Tina Turner. And the stupid bitch is still with him. I have VERY little respect for men/women who stay with their abusive boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband. If you're like that, you deserve to be beaten. So I'd like to dedicate this song to jumbo black and blue forehead (Rihanna):

I've moved into my brother's abode and we're already not getting along! At least he broke up with his asshole boyfriend who had LOTS of anger managment problems. My brother has the sweetest, most gentle pitbull named Faithfull (after Marianne). I want to train her to be agressive so if we have intruders, she can bite their nuts off!

I'm also FINALLY trying to stop smoking. I used to smoke 1 1/2 packs a day, now I smoke about 19 cigs a day and I get these AWFUL headaches from withdrawing from the amount I used to smoke. It's not as bad as caffeine withdrawal but still :\

it's been raining and pouring like a motherfucker here in SoCal. I like it though. I've always liked rain. They act like it's the end of the goddamned world if on drop falls. Rain keeps us from getting brush fires assholes! I'd go out in it, but it's very cold though. I don't however like when it's cold. But rain on!

"bring a crowbar, some rope and duct tape, and meet me on 16th ave. in the abandoned Felcher's factory"

I'm moving in with my eldest brother soon. My baby brother keeps waking me up at night. When my dad or stepmom are too lazy to feed him, I do it. And I've realized I have no maternal instincts whatsoever. So that's driving me nuts. He's cries more when I hold him too. He like my older brother (the one I live with), he should feed him at night. Breeding sucks